SKETCHES 5ème / Tom's Tomfoolery
TOM’S TOMFOOLERY
Tom enters the sitting room nervously. His father is drinking beer and watching a football match on their new, giant plasma screen tv.
Tom: Dad... I broke my DS!
Dad: (Completely absorbed in the game, not really paying attention to his son) That’s O.K, son! We’ll buy you another one.
Tom goes away, surprised and relieved. A few seconds later a cat screeches and there is a large SPLAT
Tom: (sheepishly) Dad. I’m really sorry, I just blew up the cat...!
Dad (Completely absorbed in the game, not really paying attention to his son): Don’t worry about it, son. She was old anyway. We’ll buy you another one.
Tom goes away...surprised and relieved again. A few seconds later, there’s a loud, bloodcurdling scream from the kitchen. Tom walks back into the sitting room
Tom: Dad.. I just killed mom. It was an accident. I was in the kitchen making a sandwich, I tripped and…
Dad (Completely absorbed in the game, not really paying attention to his son): Don’t worry, son, we were just about to get divorced anyway. AND she was a really bad cook.
Tom leaves the room relieved.
Dad (to himself) Ok, half-time. I think I’ll have a fag in the garden. A bit of exercise for myself. I’ve got to keep in shape!
The father leaves the room. Tom enters the room. He starts to play football.
Tom (imagining he’s a football star) : And Tom William’s got the ball. He races down the wing, beats Ashley Cole, crosses to Rooney, Rooney holds the ball up, gives it back to Tom, Tom shoots and GOOOOALLLLLLL!
The ball hits the plasma screen and the screen smashes into little pieces.
Tom: Oh-oh!
The father comes back into the room.
Dad (screaming in pain): MY TV?! NOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH
He bends down and picks up the tv in his arms as if it’s human.
Dad (sobbing): No, don’t leave me. Not like this (sniffle) We never even had a chance to say goodbye. You’re too young to die. My darling, NOOOOOHHHHH
The father turns to Tom with hatred in his eyes.
Dad : YOU! GO TO YOUR ROOM. YOU”RE GROUNDED. FOR LIFE!
THE END!!!